Leadership and Lindy Hop: What dance can teach us about our management style

The makings of a great leader can be found in unexpected places and situations, often well outside the executive suite. To illustrate this point, NationSwell sat in on a conversation between Council members Roselinde Torres and Danny Richter to talk about the surprising ways that dance — Lindy Hop, to be specific — can sometimes be illustrative of an elegant and adept management style. 

Here are the top three takeaways from the conversation:

  1. Leadership, like dance, is more effective when you take time to learn the fundamentals — specifically, figuring out how to weave together expertise and connection.
  2. Stringing together six and eight-count dances is a bit like speaking a language that your partner intuitively understands — it won’t work unless you’re on the same page. Communication in a business setting functions in a similar way: Finding common ground and speaking the same “language” is integral to any fluid, successful work relationship.
  3. Just as every dancer has a distinctive style, every leader will leave a unique imprint on their teams, and understanding yours is crucial to your presentation. Having an intuitive spatial awareness helps you to move gracefully around the dance floor, and having an intimate self-awareness can help you carry that same grace forward in a leadership role.

Keep reading for the full interview.


Danny: I’m so excited to be having this conversation, and to be having it with Roselinde, because she has a lot more experience than I do in terms of leadership. 

Roselinde: I’ve been very interested over the past three years in finding non-traditional metaphors and analogies for leadership. Oftentimes when I work with leaders, it seems for some of them that great leadership is out of their reach — like it’s not something they have within themselves. What appealed to me about Danny’s instruction with the Lindy dance is that he’s coming from a place of demonstrating leadership in an everyday activity, to some extent. It’s a reinforcement that leadership is within all of us, within everyday people, we just have to see these examples. I hope people might use the Lindy hop analogy to look at their own leadership expression, to recognize that leadership is all around us.

Danny: I began swing dancing because it was fun, because I enjoyed it, so that was my entre into dance. As my career was progressing, I had more leadership expectations and started having reports — people who were reporting to me. As I was continuing to dance, it was almost by accident that I started to notice some of the parallels I’d observed since having learned how to swing that I could use in my evolving role as a leader. And the biggest thing that struck me was that Lindy Hop, and social dancing in general, was a good way to practice leadership that a lot of people think you can’t practice. I came to realize that it’s a real and fun way to practice, and I started being intentional about weaving in elements that expose me to different people and different styles. 

As you said, Roselinde, in my work I do talk with a lot of regular people — we have 200,000 people in our organization in every U.S. state, and I get up in front of them for long periods of time, 30 minutes at a time, and the spotlight is on me and I need to improvise answers to questions. That’s actually one parallel, is that mastery of fundamentals. The fundamentals of those dances — those six count, or those eight count steps — and then combining them in new and interesting ways that match with the person I’m dancing with. In my real job it comes from mastering the fundamentals of science, policy, and economics, and then really bringing them together to weave and connect to the person who’s asking the question and address what they’re asking.

The more people I talk with, the more people I dance with, the better I get at listening and figuring out more quickly where they’re coming from and what it is they’re looking for from me. So that’s where I start to see parallels between this really practical way of becoming better, not just as a Lindy Hop swing dancer, but also as a leader, as someone who’s expected to connect with people. 

Roselinde: Right off, the thing that I hear you describing is this notion of partnership — that you have a partner that you’re working with. Most leaders now have to build relationships with many different types of partners within the organization, and outside of the organization. And the question is, do you really have a sensibility for that partner? And also, how do you interact in a way that makes them want to keep dancing with you? 

Danny: I think one thing I come back to is that I think dance is a kind of language. I generally like and appreciate language, and the different perspective that the grammar of language forces upon you when you work in the way it enables me to get an insider’s perspective, I just find it fascinating. And it’s the same thing with Lindy Hop. When you think about it, those six and eight-count dances I mentioned earlier are like words or phrases that everybody knows, almost like a cliche. When you’re stringing those together, you’re talking, you’re creating sentences, and there’s the opportunity to tell jokes purely through dance. If they expect something and then you break with that expectation, there’s a surprise — I’ve had a silent dance, and then the follow I’m dancing with just breaks out in laughter because I told a “dance joke.” And I find that absolutely fascinating, that there’s this conversation, because there’s so much nuance about how people talk to each other. There are shades of meaning for different words, and there are shades of meaning for different dances, and for different moves. That will change depending on what song you’re dancing to, and there are certain songs that have different contexts because of the words. So if you break with what is expected in the context of that actual song, that can mean something different. 

There’s also this concept of musicality — that’s how well you’re listening to the song that you’re hearing, and how you respond. So if there’s a break in the song and you know that it’s coming and you actually break, it’s a lot more enjoyable. Not only are you two dancing together, you’re working well within the context in which you’re both operating. 

What I’ve come to learn is that it’s actually pretty rare to dance with a leader who can speak verbally while you’re having this dance dialogue. But that’s something I love to do, I love to be dancing and holding a conversation. And so that’s another way that I try to connect, really — how can I have fun while dancing with this person, and also get to know them? What are the topics I can cover, and can I get them to laugh, not just because of the fun of the dance, but also because of the conversation we’re having in 3-5 minutes. It really enables me to drill down into that emotion, and to connect quickly with people. In my line of work, people are so passionate about climate — how do I figure out what they care about so that I can make them feel heard?

Roselinde: I was thinking about the use of language in dance and how you convey that, and it reminded me of a time when I did a public domain leadership event where we had people come in from different functional disciplines, and I remember a conversation between a manufacturing engineer and a creative marketer who worked for a very edgy retailer. The two of them were talking about the notion of “process discipline”. And what was interesting was that even though it was the same phrase, it meant something completely different for each of them. And when they started describing what it meant for each of them, I still remember the face of the creative marketer who was horrified at these very precise steps and seemingly conforming structures being described by the manufacturing engineer as best practice.

So I think what that brings up, Danny, to reinforce what you’re saying, is that it really is important to think about the language, the meaning of the words, for that individual, or that team that you’re trying to connect with as a leader. You can’t presume that your language is their language. You can get it from listening, you can watch feedback to see what’s resonating or what isn’t, but I also think it’s about what you said about how sometimes it’s just a matter of asking — asking questions, asking if we’re on the same page with what we’re describing. I always suggest that if people are going to do homework, to include some homework when they’re going to interact with a constituency that they may not know. A lot of times, having worked across the corporate sector, nonprofit groups and government institutions, I’d see these groups interacting with each other for various purposes, and I would always say, you really want to do your homework to see, what is that language, what is that paradigm or mental model for the way they think about time and decision-making and what matters and their values? Doing that up front, rather than just winging it and then “stepping in it” upon your first interaction and making a negative first impression which is very hard to undo.

The other thing you made me think about was the notion of leadership energy. What is the energy exchange that you get? I think energy is more aura than it is charisma, or I think it’s more resonant than it is a rational thing to describe. I imagine when you’re dancing, you’re putting yourself out there for people who want to have an experience, but then they give you something back, and that’s what informs what you choose to do.

Danny: I think that’s where the accents come in. For example, in Washington, D.C., one of the most fundamental forms of Lindy Hop is the swing out, and people in DC dance a very round swing out. But I learned in San Diego, and I learned a very linear swing out, and honestly sometimes that accent is still something I struggle with. If you go up into Baltimore, a 45-minute drive away, it’s more linear, and so there can really be these interesting accents. What you were just saying about the aura, what you leave behind, that takes us back to our original conversation of challenging you to think about what your leadership imprint is. I know what my swing dancing imprint is: I’m an energetic dancer, I’m a very stomp-y dancer. But I think that’s also a great invitation to think about what you want people to come away with as a leader in a professional context. You can think about this with music in general: We listen to music because of the way it makes us feel. I’d be interested in hearing more about what other advice you give to people on what their leadership imprint, their stamp is?

Roselinde: The notion of the imprint came up for me because I would see a dissonance where I would have a conversation with a leader in their office and then we’d go out and interact with their team or the public or whomever and for some people there was a dissonance between who they were privately and who they were publicly. And sometimes I would ask them, what do you think their experience of you was there? And most of them were unaware, either because they were more focused on themselves or nervous or focused on getting to the content of what they were delivering. And then the other place we really spent a lot of time was on new leaders. I worked with a lot of new CEOs and Presidents of organizations, people who were going to take on a new role, and I would say, you can either just let it happen — just spontaneously, whatever comes out — or you can be more intentional. If you have certain things about yourself that you want other people to experience so you know that when they have a conversation with you, it’s not only what you lead them with, it’s also what they experience in the moment. 

So people would say, well I want them to feel me as being very collaborative and open-minded, and then you’d observe their conversation and it would be dissonant because they were doing all the talking. So I think the imprint idea is, what is the experience that you deliberately create, and can you actually have elements of your imprint reinforce that.

I’ve had the benefit of watching multiple generations of leaders, and those imprints actually stay with people. You can trace it all the way through different leaders and different configurations. Coming back to the dance analogy, I’m going to bet that if you’re dancing with someone and they experience something while dancing with you that delights them or awes them or makes them feel like, ‘wow, that’s really a cool move,’ that they’re probably going to share that with other people. They’re probably just going to put that into their repertoire and keep sharing it.

Danny: You were talking about the level of self-awareness you need to have, and there are lots of ways you can practice this. One of the things I do is dance with people who are below my skill level, and I always ask, ‘would it be alright if I try to teach you something?’ Because a lot of times, people don’t want to do that. So that self-awareness that people don’t want to learn, they’re just there to have fun, but also just where your body is. If they’re way more skilled than me, I try to move out of the way and give them breaks so that they can show off and be the star of our partnership. It comes back to this idea of listening being so important, in dancing and in leadership.

And that awareness needs to extend in a physical sense as well. One of the easiest ways to just totally make sure someone has a bad time is to send them into a wall or another person. You need to not just have awareness of where you are and where they are, but also what’s coming at you. You need to just have general awareness of what’s going on. 

Roselinde: I think from now on I’m going to quote this notion of “sending somebody into a wall,” because how many leaders have done that unintentionally? I think the other aspect of sending someone into a wall may be emotional sometimes. Maybe not physically pushing, but the same principles apply, right? What is going on around you, and are you paying attention? Sometimes you may have a conception of reality that’s very different from what another person’s is, so you’re going along and you’re doing whatever, but in their reality, they just hit a wall, a psychological wall, an emotional wall, whatever. So it’s obviously unintended, you don’t want to intentionally send someone there. 

Danny: I do want to pick up on one thing Roselinde just said, about sending people into an emotional wall. There are some things that I learned very early on in dance, including the fact that there are leads and there are follows. Generally speaking, men are leads, generally speaking, women are follows, but there are many women who have led and many men who have followed. One of the things I check up on is, how do I make sure that women who are choosing to dance as a follower are in power? One of the things that they emphasize is that you can just say no. There’s an important element of power in swing dance that should be really fundamental in any conversation, but in terms of throwing people into a wall, one thing I’ve seen many times is you get people in your class who have just learned the pretzel, or they’ve just learned how to do aerials, and they really want to try them out but they’re kind of dangerous. You almost never see aerials in social dancing, you’ll see them in competitions, but those are the things that you really need to ask for, that you can’t do without permission. So that’s another way you can avoid that emotional wall — if you’re consistently saying, let’s do this thing, let’s do this new thing I learned, I want to try it, but your partner says ‘nope,’ they can end the dance right there and just walk away. So there is this element of power that you can get at with dance as well, and there are parallels — not just for leadership, but also in life.

Roselinde: It’s interesting, I hadn’t even thought about the notion of gender roles in the traditional frame of dancing, but I do like this idea of aerials. Sometimes if you’re going to do something extraordinary that’s never been done before — and after all leadership is about guiding people to a place they probably have not been, or they want to go but don’t quite know how to get there — I do think leaders will be asking permission to do “aerials” from time to time. So I do think allowing teams to say no, they don’t want to do it, is important, and maybe there are other ways to build confidence.

I’ve used this term ‘confidence currency,’ which is the transfer of a currency of belief. That people believe they can do something, when you equip them with the skills, resources, capabilities, backups, constituencies, to do it. I do think aerials are fantastic, and it’s often a task of leadership to do something extraordinary by identifying and supporting those who can do the aerials.  If it was easy, or common, everyone would be doing them, right? 


NationSwell is an award-winning social impact company that assists changemakers, thought leaders and purpose-driven business executives as they drive social impact at scale. Through a robust membership community and the nation’s leading social impact studio, NationSwell supports these impact leaders on a range of our world’s most pressing issues. Learn more here.

Learnings from NationSwell’s event on ‘Protecting the Dignity of LGBTQIA+ Youth’

While many of the bills put forth will face significant legal challenges, the message they were drafted to convey is chilling on its face: After decades spent winning new legal protections, the LGBTQIA+ community is no longer safe in America.

In Idaho, HB 675 seeks to make it a felony for parents or doctors to give hormones or puberty blockers to trans minors, reclassifying the act as “genital mutilation,” and attaching a maximum sentence of up to life in prison. In Iowa, Gov. Kim Reynolds in March signed the pernicious HF 2416 into law, which prohibits transgender youth from playing on sports teams that correlate to their gender identity. And on July 1 — just two days after a NationSwell hosted a panel discussion dedicated to “Protecting the Dignity of LGBTQIA+ Youth” — the Ron DeSantis-backed piece of legislation known colloquially as the “Don’t Say Gay” law went into effect in Florida, effectively banning public school teachers from any mention of sexual orientation or gender identity in the classroom.

During NationSwell’s mainstage event, Colorado Gov. Jared Polis — the first openly gay man to be elected governor of a U.S. state — used his opening remarks to call upon “all 50 states” to protect same-sex marriage in state law amid fears that the Supreme Court will soon revisit the landmark Obergefell v. Hodges decision. And panelists Carl Siciliano, founder of the Ali Forney Center, Sam Ames, director of advocacy and government affairs at The Trevor Project, and Janelle Perez, a Florida State Senate candidate — alongside moderator Lauren Baer, a managing partner for Arena — joined Polis in calling for swift action to affirm the dignity and protect the rights of queer youth.

Below are some of the key takeaways from the conversation.


Young people — particularly homeless queer youths — have always been at the heart of the fight for LGBTQ+ dignity. While the trans activists Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera are most often credited with throwing the first brick during the Stonewall uprising of 1969, Carl offered the prescient reminder that the homeless queer youths hanging out in Sheridan Square that night were also instrumental in contributing the “lightning rod moment” that sparked the riots. As Siciliano noted: “Queer youth have always been at the center of the movement that launched our rights, and even 50 years later, we still have to work so hard to protect queer youth. It’s not just a smooth march towards progress.”

Pay attention to who is being left out of the conversation. As Ames noted, the Stonewall riots were about who was being disenfranchised and silenced — an important reminder we need to carry with us today in identifying the communities or groups most vulnerable to the constant string of attacks against the queer community. Sex workers, unhoused people, and incarcerated individuals who identify as LGBTQIA+ will all need special attention in the fight for dignity, and getting involved with and embedded in those communities at the local level will be more important than ever before.

The “gay agenda” exists, and it involves making the world safer for future generations. While conservatives frequently play political football with the idea of a monolithic “gay agenda” that seeks to trick and corrupt heterosexual children, Perez argued that the opposite is actually true. “‘You’re so worried about the gay agenda, but the gay agenda is just that we want to make things better for the generation behind us,” she said. “We’re all fighting for them to have a better life than we did, and we’re seeing that our fight isn’t over.” While GOP lawmakers frequently use the specter of the “gay agenda” to malign the LGBTQ+ community as predators and groomers in pursuit of their legislative agendas, Perez said that having conversations about a different type of agenda — one that seeks to protect queer and trans youth and their families — will need to be had loudly and often to counteract that political propaganda.

Trans girls — the “most marginalized of the marginalized” — are being targeted with particular ferocity. According to Ames, the discourse is currently being dominated by two primary groups: demagogues and dogmatists. While the dogmatists are the same religious crusaders who have long sought to undermine gay rights, the demagogues are relatively new as a phenomenon, and frequently use hate-mongering to fuel their aspirations for higher offices. Both groups have set trans girls in the crosshairs of their anti-gay agendas, targeting gender-affirming care — access to which has been proven to be highly correlated with suicide risk — with particular enthusiasm.

Mobilizing the politically apathetic will be a critical part of the fight to preserve LGBTQ rights. According to Siciliano, if the queer community and its allies hopes to protect the community from the legal threats it currently faces, they will have to engage people who are not typically politically engaged, using threats to freedoms as a galvanizing force. 

“It’s without a doubt that LGBTQ youth are going to face more risk of homelessness, bullying, suicide; look in your local communities to those who are dealing with these issues and connect, try to protect the young people who are going to face the brunt of these attacks,” he said. “Do what you can to support the organizations working to protect young people.”

Take the fight offline. Posting infographics to Instagram won’t be enough; as Baer pointed out, the next phase of the fight will necessarily involve showing up in real life and engaging with communities directly. Although it’s still important to read, listen, and tweet when necessary, enshrining the dignity of LGBTQ youth must also involve practical tactics like supporting direct service organizations and, if you’re planning to run for office, attending political training sessions like those offered by Arena that can help you run a winning campaign.

“During this critical time, don’t sit back,” Lauren said. “Lean in and become involved, because everything really is on the line for the queer community.”

Why it’s in everyone’s interest to close the U.S. longevity gap

In the United States, data show that gaps in life expectancy fall along racial, socioeconomic, and geographic lines. The implications of this longevity gap ripple through every aspect of our society. 

In our recently released AARP report, Our Collective Future: The Economic Impact of Unequal Life Expectancy, we examine the costs of the American longevity gap, calculating the continued and cumulative economic costs of racial disparities in life expectancy while also emphasizing the human and societal costs. Through these findings, we challenge everyone to envision what it would take for all people in this country to live longer and reach their fullest potential. 

As the report reveals, these disparities don’t just disrupt people’s ability to live longer, healthier, and more productive lives —  they also stifle economic growth, resulting in lost opportunities and lost contributions not just for the individuals who are impacted, but for society at large.


Shining a light on existing disparities

Inequality and disparities in health and well-being are not new phenomena. However, the pandemic has surfaced and exacerbated the pervasive disparities that existed in health, wealth, and life expectancy.

In 2019, Black people could expect to live 4.1 years less than the average person in the United States. This gap rose to 5.5 years during the first year of the pandemic in 2020. In addition, we know that the pandemic has resulted in a disproportionate number of deaths among Black and Latino people, widening the gap even more.


Too steep a price

By 2030, racial disparities in life expectancy will cost the United States an estimated 10.1 million jobs, which AARP calculates will translate to an annual loss of $1.1 trillion in total consumer spending by 2030.

But the toll of racial disparities in life expectancy isn’t purely economic: It is quite literally life and death. Our researchers found that an additional 5.9 million people would be alive in 2030 if everyone had the same opportunities over the next decade to live longer, healthier lives.

The people we are losing aren’t just mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins. They are also vital to local, regional, and national economies and industries. Many of these costs will be borne by the services, construction, and health sectors, which are most sensitive to population changes.


Solving the longevity gap

While the statistics around the country’s growing longevity gap serve as a sobering call-to-action, these disparities do not have to lead to despair. They are not intractable challenges. Inequality does not have to be status quo, and life expectancy should not be determined by geography or zip codes. There are solutions — and the solutions can be found across stakeholders from policymakers, businesses, communities, and the individual choices we make.

So what’s it going to take? The answer can be summed up in three words: commitment, collaboration, and thought leadership.

Public, private, and philanthropic sectors should work collectively to identify, advance, and accelerate solutions to reduce and eliminate health disparities. Together, they can create a marketplace of ideas fueled by data, insights, and timely analysis. As our nation continues to become more diverse, a prosperous future will require equitable systems , which sustain prosperity for all

AARP’s mission is to empower people to choose how they live as they age. It is in our DNA to help people live longer, healthier lives. This includes addressing disparities in health and wealth, and reducing the gap in life expectancy for communities of color.

This is why we work to improve access to healthcare, make communities more livable, support older workers, and work across sectors so that we can close the longevity gap and help people to lead healthy and productive lives.


The time is now

James Baldwin once said, “There is never time in the future in which we will work out our salvation. The challenge is in the moment; the time is always now.”

We can and should work now to change the longevity gap so that we don’t have to bear the cost of lost opportunity and productivity for future generations. Instead, let’s harness the potential of all of America’s talent and truly allow people to live and age equitably and productively.

Staci Alexander is the Vice President of Thought Leadership for AARP.

Learnings from NationSwell’s Institutional Member community event on inspiring teams

But when external forces threaten our own morale and livelihoods in addition to those of our teams and corporate cultures, it can be an especially daunting task to inspire and unite with grace. The first step, then, must necessarily be to ensure that we are operating as a fulfilled human beings first and as leaders second — the old saw about “putting your oxygen mask on first,” has never been truer.

In a recent NationSwell Institutional Member roundtable event, members convened to share practical advice on how to strengthen morale and build a robust culture of inspiration within our teams and beyond. They discussed the steps they’re taking to manage their time amid previously unthinkable distractions, what they’re reading, and how they keep their teams inspired and aligned, even in the face of daunting social challenges.

Here are some of the key learnings and takeaways from the event.

A fixed feedback ratio makes a real difference.

When deployed successfully, using a ‘5-to-1 ratio’ when providing feedback to team members — making sure that there are 5 positive call-outs for every one negative piece of feedback — can help keep team members receptive to negative or constructive feedback, if it ever arises.

Embrace the ‘fourth prong’ of inspiration.

While many thought leaders agree that a sense of growth or purpose, the ability to learn, and personal autonomy are key components of the framework that motivates humans as a species, a fourth prong — sense of identity and belonging — can be just as instrumental in helping to keep team members inspired.

Hybrid connections necessitate increased intentionality.
As we navigate the changing work landscape that Covid-19 has created, we need to be mindful and intentional about designing experiences going forward. In creating hybrid connections, it’s important to think about what makes it useful for people to come into an office, and what kinds of activities actually foster a sense of belonging.

Leaders must bear the burden of risk.

As we grow professionally, leadership is laced with risk — we have to be prepared to bear the burden of those risks for those we lead and those within our sphere of influence.

The ‘progress principle’ unlocks your workers’ best.

Employees are most motivated when they have a manager who works with them to evaluate their goals and keep tabs on their progress.

Utilize a “go-with-the-flow” mentality.

Trust that all the pieces fall into place if they’re meant to, and revitalize teams by moving on quickly when something out of your control isn’t working.

52 small celebrations a year

Making space for weekly wins is a simple but valuable tool to help support and encourage.


NationSwell’s Institutional Membership program is built for leading corporations, philanthropies, and investment firms, designed to help leaders take their work in CSR, ESG, DEI, Impact Investing, Sustainability, and Philanthropy to the next level. Learn more about NationSwell’s Institutional Membership community here.

Learnings from our ‘Selflessness in Practice’ event on caregiving

That’s never been truer than it is now, two years into a pandemic that demands so much of our physical, emotional, and mental energy. According to a report from the Centers for Disease Control gauging the toll of the pandemic on caregivers, 70% of adults in caregiving roles reported adverse mental health symptoms like depression and anxiety.

But organizational leaders can make a difference if they begin to see the workplaces they lead as a place to create systems to support working caregivers.

In a NationSwell conversation with caregiving expert Dr. Jean Accius, Senior Vice President of Thought Leadership for AARP, NationSwell member Paurvi Bhatt, and MSNBC’s Rich Lui, author of the new book “Enough About Me,” these leaders and experts highlighted the unexpected ways that  workplaces are well-positioned to provide caregivers with compassion and dignity, and how performing small acts of selflessness can chart a course towards making our own lives more satisfying.

Here are some of the most compelling insights from the digital event:


Model compassion towards the caregivers in your workforce

Compassionate conversations about caregiving start with a business’s leadership. Shifting the tone at the C Suite-level by raising awareness and conversations in meetings can help employees to have the courage to talk about it directly so that the middle managers feel more comfortable and empowered.

Don’t just support your caregivers — learn from them

Caregiving is a transferable skill set — and your organization stands a lot to learn by amplifying and listening to the voices of caregivers. The ability to narrate, to be an advocate, to multitask and laugh through hard times are all qualities that could benefit organizations and society more broadly, and are all qualities that the leaders of the future will need to embody.

Familiarize yourself with the business case for supporting caregivers

Beyond the ethical imperative to support caregivers, businesses and organizations can also look to the data supporting clear financial incentives to provide for caregivers at work.

With an estimated 60% of caregivers reporting that they’re still working while providing care for their loved ones, jobs that provide tangible benefits and support to working caregivers, including employee resource groups and generous leave policies, are better positioned to retain talent and maintain a healthy bottom line.

Create a work culture that normalizes caregiving

Lui said that creating a culture of care in the workplace starts with the prevalence of caregiving — even among employees who might not outwardly seem like they’re struggling.

“Think about the next conversation through a lens of care, and when someone needs some help, open the door to conversations in order to change the culture from the ground up,” Lui said. “If you’re in a meeting, chances are at least three of the people in there with you are going through some kind of challenge with caregiving.”

Conversations about mental health must go hand-in-hand with conversations about caregiving and physical health. The more we can normalize the mental health journey associated with caregiving, the more we will normalize all conversations about health.


For more insights and learnings on the subject of caregiving, watch our event.

The true impact of how you lead lies in your ‘leadership score’

What if, in attempting to measure impact, we began to think about leadership as a different type of score — a musical score — where emitting the right chords has the potential to attract the most talented people, assemble teams who outperform, and inspire confidence and commitment, particularly during a time when cultivating trust online and via social media platforms is increasingly essential? A musical metaphor is particularly apt when you consider how virtuoso musicians evolve their performance expression over time to suit different audiences, incorporate evolving trends, and tap into new creative energies. But in addition to being expressive and adaptable, a good musician — like a good leader — must also embody an additional set of qualities that are easy to remember for their important function in the process of music-making: range, rhythm, representation, and reach. 


A musician like the Grammy Award-winning American singer and songwriter Brandi Carlile, for example, has adapted her musical repertoire over the years by keenly observing the routines of other performers, including Elton John, Dolly Parton, Joni Mitchell, and Mavis Staples. While always maintaining her identifiable voice, Carlile’s singing range has acquired more resonant pitch, elucidation, and interpretation over the years. She’s gained competence across many rhythmic genres including country, rock, R&B, gospel, and improvised syncopations.  Whether she’s a soloist, singing a 3-part harmony with her bandmates, or jamming with a stage full of musicians of all backgrounds, these representations allow broad audiences to “see themselves on the stage” and thereby feel a deeper emotional connection to her music and its meaning. Her intentional collaborations with varied artists like Alicia Keys, Dave Mathews,  Indigo Girls, Pearl Jam and symphony orchestras have expanded her reach from small coffee houses to sold-out concerts in premiere venues and across video streams worldwide, creating community and cultivating new audiences as she goes. 

In reviewing the body of work leading up to my TED talk and coaching programs developed for leaders of various demographics in the private, public and non-profit sectors, I see these four elements as positive impact indicators that consistently show up in the repertoires of the successful leaders with whom I’ve worked over the past three decades.

These leaders demonstrate an expressive range by using tonal variety and oratorical force to create a soaring energy that fosters unexpected connection and creates an aura of intimacy that pulls people in. They successfully utilize rhythm by adjusting to new contexts and different paces and pressures seamlessly — their expansive set of experiences and interests allows them to presciently see trends to manifest successes while also fluidly navigating setbacks. Good leaders understand the importance of mobilizing their followers through representation — the diversity of the people that they surround themselves with in order to uncover and achieve atypical, trailblazing outcomes — and also make it a point to have others’ contributions explicitly represented in the final product and forward path. Finally, impactful leaders have a reach that is defined not by the number of people who report to them, but rather by how many people they convene with convincing influence and uncompromised ethics. They expand this reach by seeking “outside-your-usual circle” partners who cooperate to make more happen than each party could on their own. 

These four elements — range, rhythm, representation, and reach — provide a structure that we can use to better gauge the impact of our own personal leadership styles. We can start to understand these four principles more clearly when we look back on the exemplars who came before us — those who have left an indelible, soul-piercing mark on us through brief encounters that continue to shape our beliefs and values years later. Reconnecting with an exemplar’s imprint reminds us of the essence of our best leadership expressions, and the recollected memory also serves as a prism by which we can retool our current leadership approach to meet the moment we’re facing. 


In conducting this type of heartfelt, insistent scrutiny on myself, I frequently draw on memories of my own Puerto Rican maternal family elders, who provided formative, grounding examples of leadership that continue to inform what I value in myself as I continue to evolve my own leadership practice today. My mother Crimilda’s range made her the dynamic diva at any party. Her mastery of cadence and intonation in her voice made her a captivating narrator. Whether teaching students, leading family holiday cheers, reciting heartfelt poems, or holding a congregation in reverent prayer, my mother’s vocal range nuances enthralled listeners. She recited Latin American poems with gestures, facial expressions and vocalizations that always upped the energy in the room whether from tears of sadness or joy. At times of crushing tragedy, she would interject humor to unexpectedly good effect whether in person or on the phone. My heartiest laughter was evoked by my mother.

My younger aunt, Alicia, was situationally, rhythmically confident. When we were growing up, she would let me accompany her to outside-our-neighborhood bodegas to try egg cream sodas and flavored bubble gums — delicacies to us, not available at home. In the library, she paraded me to multiple floors of books from different genres. Her career path was eclectic, and she pursued and excelled in jobs across domains as different as publishing, community service, media, politics, and collections. She was a fast learner and moved seamlessly from executive assistant positions to leadership roles, to producing and policy making. In conversations today, we still explore off-the-beaten path topics.

My older aunt, Titi Mary, is central to our family, and mouthwatering smells from her delicious sancocho, pasteles, and pernil bring a motley representation of people to her kitchen table. The spread is dispensed with family folklore, conjuring up those beloved members who have passed, as if channeling and infusing their energy within us. She pulls people in, even when aggressively confronted by others’ imperfections. Her compassionate and cheerful manner is like a big, inclusive “abrazo fuerte” to others who in turn, tightly embrace her. In her 80’s, she is still bonding so many to her and each other. To taste her cooking is to savor her love.

And finally, my grandmother, Sol, was a shy, unassuming woman, but her reach was proactive and long lasting. As a single mother, transplanted from Puerto Rico to New York City, she linked up with her siblings’ families to expand the resources and caregiving available to her children. My grandmother’s impact was direct and measurable — her children attained more in life than many would have expected given dire social and economic beginnings. Grandmother Sol, which translates to Sun,  showed that one’s indirect reach is both illuminating and generative when the gain is communally beneficial.


In these vignettes, I am attempting to conjure the temperaments of these family members in order to illustrate that an imprint left by a great leader stays with you for the duration of your experience. It internally transforms you. Although our own expressions of these values will always be unique to us, fine-tuning our leadership score is a process of study, reflection, intention, and practice, and there are good questions you can use to score your own leadership playbook. 

When thinking about range, ask yourself what you’re trying to communicate, and if the mood you’re creating is appropriate to the moment. Is your language poetic or platitudinal? What brings your stories to life? What props or digital tools/platforms increase the emotional and rational resonance of your message? Do your messages invite people to join you or coerce them to comply? How do you know people are feeling confident they can contribute to the mission or strategy? 

In considering rhythm, reflect on how many different communities, cultures and institutions you’ve interacted with, and how many functional disciplines you’ve traversed. How many growth, turnaround, and crises contexts have you led in? How varied are your information sources? What analytical or intuitive algorithms inform your decisions? What new publications, music, recreational activities have you discovered? Are your selected podcasts, websites, and video streams reinforcing or expanding your views? Who are people that you are curious about and want to get to know better?

When scoring yourself on representation, ask yourself to reflect honestly on the diversity of the people around your leadership table and in key influence roles: 

  • 1. During major gatherings, who shares the stage with you? 
  • 2. Who speaks for the organization when engaging with external audiences? 
  • 3. What is the diversity of the characters featured in the stories you tell? 
  • 4. In your meetings, how much time is your voice heard compared to others? 
  • 5. How often do you say the names and contributions of others who enable what you’re trying to achieve?

And finally, in measuring your own reach, reflect on who you would follow if you did not have the title that you do. How do you describe the benefit of collaborating with you, and what would cause you to lose credibility? How many partnerships are outside your organization? How are you augmenting the capabilities of others? To what extent do your partners’ followers follow you? How open are you to new ideas and challenges from the broader followership? What are non-negotiable values or principles when establishing your partnerships? How will you address any fallout if a partner you’ve collaborated with suffers reputational damage?


Returning to the initial question of how you measure your leadership impact, it’s not that quantitative outcomes don’t matter — they just don’t reveal enough about your actual leadership, or about what makes you, specifically, someone to believe in and commit to. Determining the musical score of your leadership is based on more subjective indicators, like the lasting feelings you evoke and what people choose to take with them and incorporate into their own systems and processes. Describing Brandi Carlile’s impact, Brittney Spencer, an early-career musician, once said: “Brandi’s level of musicality makes you want to bring your best game in her presence. And her generosity is the kind that spikes other people’s capacity and desire to give. She has an understated magical ability that compels others to show up as their best, most authentic, and most innovative self”. That sounds like an excellent, highly impactful, leadership score to me.

Tuning your musical leadership score culminates in amplified, not imagined, impact. Perfecting your leadership score is not about you as an orchestra leader directing everyone else’s performance; it’s about you as a performer, tuning your self-expression in ways that lift and inspire those around you to elevate a vision with their own contributions.


Roselinde Torres has been a trusted advisor to private, public, and nonprofit sector leaders enabling them to imagine and achieve their leadership ambitions. Her TED talk “What it takes to be a great leader” has received around six million views. She serves as a Trustee of the Wildlife Conservation Society and has been a Nationswell Council Member since 2015. The author is grateful to Familia elders for their ever resonant scores, Brandi Carlile for multiform musicality, Brian Carson, Phil Cook, Caroline Mak, Brianna Provenzano and Anthony Smith for bettering this composition, and Tammy Conley for resounding belief.

The business case for increasing investment in the 50-plus

Change is constant in business. There are always new ideas, new products, new ways to work better. That’s how it should be. Businesses and non-profit organizations get themselves into trouble when they think they have it all figured out. Comfortable companies get complacent, and those that grow rigid risk ruining their reputations as thought-leaders. By contrast, organizations that embrace change stay innovative and agile. 

That is what we have seen over the last year and a half. Rigid companies that resisted change suffered—revenue plummeted, employees resigned, and some even went out of business—while businesses that adapted quickly survived and in some cases thrived during the pandemic and gained new strategies and tools to use for the future. 


That is not to say that there were no bumps along the way for the organizations that navigated the rough seas successfully. The pandemic caught many of us off guard (even though the scientific community had, in fact, warned us something like this could happen). 

We do not want to be caught off guard again. One giant trend is coming, and in many ways, is already upon us. Every company, board director, and leader should ensure their business has a strategy to seize its possibilities for growth. 

That trend is the unprecedented aging of the population. With life expectancies on the rise and birth rates declining, the growth of the older population is steadily outpacing that of younger generations around the world. People aged 60 and over already account for more than one billion of the world’s population; this age group is expected to double—to over two billion—by 2050. Not only are we aging, but in many places, we are living longer than previous generations. In countries where people are aging well, more than half of children born today are projected to live to see their 100th birthday.

What if leaders miscalculate, underestimate, or even worse—ignore this major demographic shift? Businesses that miss out on the aging population will be in crisis, and the risk to organizations and their bottom line could be catastrophic. 

That said, crises can be opportunities—but only for those leaders who are prepared. What do businesses need to do to be prepared? 

First, awareness and understanding

As organizations face immediate and unprecedented economic challenges due to the coronavirus pandemic, it is a critical time to recognize the growing aging population as part of a strategy for economic recovery and growth. The truth is, this is an opportunity—a multi-trillion-dollar market opportunity. Older adults are consumers, taxpayers, workers, and business owners. Many also add massive value through volunteering and serving as family caregivers. The purchasing power of older adults generates significant tax revenue, creates jobs, and creates stability in other important areas, like health care, housing, and transportation for essential workers, families, veterans, and small business owners, all of whom were very hard hit by the pandemic.

Business leaders, therefore, must embrace longevity. Here are three reasons why:

It’s good for businesses.
If the 50-plus population comprised a country, its economy would be the third biggest in the world (after the U.S. and China). People aged 50 and older have massive purchasing power, which creates jobs and opportunities across all generations, grows revenue, and fuels and sustains businesses of all sizes. According to AARP’s Longevity Economy Outlook, the economic contribution of the 50-plus population was worth $8.3 trillion in 2018. Fifty-six cents of every dollar was spent by someone over the age of 50. By 2050, their economic impact is expected to more than triple to $26.8 trillion, and 61 cents of every dollar will be spent by someone over the age of 50. Businesses that are ready to catch this wave will sail right past their competition.

It’s good for governments.
The 50-plus population (which make up 35 percent of the U.S. population) is also a major source of revenue for federal, state, and local governments to provide the services and infrastructure businesses and communities count on.  Nearly half of federal revenues in 2018, or $1.4 trillion, came from the 50-plus cohort —a figure set to nearly quadruple to $5.5 trillion by 2050. We see a similar picture with regards to state finances. The 50-plus cohort is responsible for almost $650 billion in state revenues today. By 2050, its contribution is forecast to approach $2.4 trillion. Business and public leaders can work together to invest those resources in our communities to grow a stronger, healthier economy for everyone.

It’s good for individuals of all ages.
As people live longer, many will either want or need to continue working. Studies have shown that working past age 65 is linked to better health and longevity. Not only that, studies show that age-inclusive companies report higher worker satisfaction across the board, and satisfied workers are more committed, creative, and productive. That is not the only way they add value. Older workers also contribute experience to multi-generational teams, participate in encore careers, and lead in entrepreneurship.


Next, take decisive action

It is clear why businesses should embrace a strategy for the longevity economy. Each and every business stands to gain from tapping into the opportunities of the 50-plus market. To maximize that longevity dividend, though, we must act now. Government leaders, business leaders, non-profit leaders, and each of us as individual leaders have a role to play. For example,  private-sector leaders and product developers must think past outdated stereotypes when creating solutions. And advertisers must authentically represent the full spectrum of living as people age. We must all work together to test and develop new approaches to learning, earning, living, and connecting with each other as we live longer lives. 

Change is constant in business, and innovation is not just for products. Even long-established organizations boasting household names need to stay flexible, adaptive, and innovative to seize new opportunities. By building a workplace culture that embraces change, we can continue to meet our clients and customers where they are while setting the pace as thought leaders in our fields.


Finally, a radical thought

Your customers are aging, yet there is no longevity crisis. There is only a longevity opportunity, which benefits businesses, communities, and governments. And that opportunity is just waiting for you to embrace it. So will you?

To Build It Back Better, Give Ourselves Permission to Feel

For #BuildItBackBetter, NationSwell asked some of our nation’s most celebrated purpose-driven leaders how they’d build a society that is more equitable and resilient than the one we had before COVID-19. We have compiled and lightly edited their answers.

This article is part of the #BuildItBackBetter track “The Relational Era: Building a Culture of Connection, Bridging and Belonging” — presented in partnership with Einhorn Collaborative.

Let’s get the obvious question out of the way first: What’s up with that title? Since when does anybody need permission to feel? True, we all have feelings more or less continuously, every waking moment without ever asking or getting anyone’s approval. To stop feeling would be like to stop thinking, eating or breathing. Not possible.

Our emotions are a big part — maybe the biggest part — of what makes us human. And yet we go through life trying hard to pretend otherwise. 

Too often we do our best to deny or hide our feelings—even from ourselves. Our mindsets about them get passed along to our children, who learn by watching and listening to us, their caregivers and teachers—their role models. Our kids receive the message loud and clear, so that before long, they, too, have learned to suppress even the most urgent messages from deep inside. 

So we deny ourselves — and one another — permission to feel. We toughen up, squash it down and behave irrationally. We avoid the difficult conversation with a loved one; we explode at a colleague; and we go through an entire bag of chips and have no idea why. When we deny ourselves the permission to feel, a long list of unwanted outcomes ensues. We lose the ability to even perceive what we’re feeling — it’s like, without noticing, we go a little numb inside. When that happens, we’re unable to understand what’s happening in our lives that’s causing it. Because of that we’re unable to label it, so we can’t express it clearly, either, in ways the people around us would understand.

And when we can’t identify how we feel, it’s impossible for us to do anything productive about our feelings: to use them wisely — to accept and embrace them all. In order to build a culture of connection, bridging, and belonging – in our homes, schools, workplaces and communities – we must learn to make our emotions work for us, not against us.

I’ve spent the last 25 years trying to unpack these issues. Through academic research and plenty of real-life experience, especially in the world of education. I also have a personal interest in the bad things that happen when we deny ourselves permission to feel. Meaning I’ve been there, but thanks to a host of interventions and one special person, in particular, I made it out alive. 

Only a few naturally insightful among us can claim to have these “emotion skills” without consciously pursuing them. I had to learn them. And these are real skills. People from all backgrounds with all personality types will find them accessible and even life-changing. And they can be acquired by anyone of almost any age.

These skills can be used privately, but their best application is throughout a community, so that a network emerges to reinforce its own influence. I have seen this happen—our whole-school approach to social and emotional learning, RULER, is being deployed in thousands of schools all over the world, with incredible results. 

A number of years ago, I was training leaders in an underperforming school district. At lunch on the first day, I was standing in the buffet line next to a principal, and to make small talk, I asked him, “So, what do you think about the session so far?” He looked me in the eye, then looked down at the food and said, “The desserts look pretty good.” 

I realized at that moment what I was up against. I’m used to resistance, but his response hit hard. I decided at that moment that I had to reach him. His superintendent was fully on board, but it was clear that we would succeed in this district only if the other 100 leaders were also believers.

At the end of a couple of days of intensive teaching, I took a risk and said to the principal, “The other day, when we met, you weren’t so sure this course was going to work for you. I’m curious, now that you’ve spent two days learning about your own emotional intelligence and how to implement the skills in your school, what do you think?”  He stood up, looked around the room at his colleagues, turned and looked at me, and, honest, he started to cry. He said, “I didn’t know what I didn’t know. Thank you for giving me the permission to feel.” 

Let’s begin there.

Marc Brackett, Ph.D., is the Founder and Director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a Professor in the Child Study Center of Yale University. He’s also the author of  “Permission To Feel: The Power of Emotional Intelligence to Achieve Well-being and Success.”

To Build It Back Better, Invest in Belonging

For #BuildItBackBetter, NationSwell asked some of our nation’s most celebrated purpose-driven leaders how they’d build a society that is more equitable and resilient than the one we had before COVID-19. We have compiled and lightly edited their answers.

This article is part of the #BuildItBackBetter track “The Relational Era: Building a Culture of Connection, Bridging and Belonging” — presented in partnership with Einhorn Collaborative.

Over the past few decades, the landscape of American civic life has transformed. Participation in key civic institutions such as religious groups and volunteer organizations has plummeted, and our public square has been replaced with online echo chambers.  

But there is still one place in American life where adults of all backgrounds come together to pursue a shared goal: the workplace. Here many of us spend each day working alongside people of different ages, races, ethnicities, gender identities, national origins, and religions.

In many ways, the goal of American companies reflects the motto of the Great American Experiment, “e pluribus unum” (“out of many, one”). They’re tasked with the herculean challenge of forging community and a sense of shared identity among a vastly diverse group of individuals, and each company must find a way to harness the individual strengths of the group to accomplish its collective goals. 

Unfortunately, as American society has been torn apart by polarization and division, workplaces have been finding that they are not immune to these trends.

Over the past few years, employees have become increasingly divided over ideological differences. According to a recent poll, nearly one-third of working Americans are worried that they will miss out on career opportunities or lose their jobs if their political opinions were discovered. This concern is roughly consistent across political orientation, race, gender, and socioeconomic status.

When your workplace has a multiplicity of values and worldviews nested within a culture of outrage and intolerance, you have a tinderbox on your hands. Companies must be proactive in creating cultures that foster openness, intellectual humility, and mutual respect across differences. 

Doing so isn’t just good for our country. It’s also good for your bottom line. Research shows that fostering a sense of belonging within the workplace has a direct impact on improving work performance, motivation, and engagement. 

According to a study conducted by BetterUp, employees who feel a strong sense of belonging show a 56% increase in performance, a 75% decrease in sick days, a 50% reduction in turnover risk compared to peers with a low sense of belonging.

The data is clear: Investing in building a culture of belonging and inclusion pays. 

While there is no quick fix to culture change, there are steps you can take in the right direction. For example, OpenMind offers practical, scalable, and evidence-based tools to foster openness to diverse perspectives and equip people with skills for constructive dialogue. 

OpenMind’s online learning program helps employees understand values and perspectives that differ from their own. It addresses conflicts that tend to arise in diverse workplaces and provides employees with practical skills to navigate differences more effectively.

While our other institutions struggle, workplaces can model what it means to create a space where Americans from all walks of life feel respected, included and heard. Those who move in this direction will surely reap the benefits.

Caroline Mehl is the Co-Founder and Executive Director of OpenMind. You can learn more about her work here.

The Relational Era: What We Need to Build a Culture of Connection, Bridging and Belonging

For #BuildItBackBetter, NationSwell asked some of our nation’s most celebrated purpose-driven leaders how they’d build a society that is more equitable and resilient than the one we had before COVID-19. We have compiled and lightly edited their answers.

No matter who we are, how we live, or what we believe, we all share a deep, instinctual need and capacity for human connection and belonging. It’s at the core of our shared humanity — and baked into our DNA. 

As human beings, we yearn to be in relationship: to feel seen, valued and understood; to inhabit places where we live together, work together and look out for each other; to be part of a community of shared values and aspirations that is bigger than ourselves. 

And yet, we are living in a culture that all too often reinforces just the opposite. A culture that stokes distrust and amplifies divisions. That fuels hyper-individualism and alienates us from ourselves and each other. A culture that creates a distorted sense of belonging for some of us by telling others they don’t belong. 

As we navigate the “twin pandemics” of COVID-19 and racial injustice, we face a fundamental challenge that lies at the heart of all others: a crisis of human connection. 

All around us, we see more and more Americans living in isolation, loneliness, anxiety, and fear. And all too often, our culture reinforces a zero-sum game that seeks to benefit by pulling us further apart — with an “us vs them” mentality that’s eroding our faith in each other, our institutions and the future we seek for our children. 

The sheer speed and scale of these challenges can seem overwhelming, but beneath them lies a simple and inescapable truth: we cannot solve our nation’s most complex and urgent challenges unless we see, hear and understand each other first.

If we want to build it back better, we must draw upon one of the greatest and oldest technologies we have as a species: human connection. Our ability to connect, empathize, build relationships, and collaborate may be our greatest gift. When we start to see ourselves in others and recognize that our own humanity is a reflection of our shared humanity, we begin to shift from a culture of turning on one another to turning toward one another. 

Einhorn Collaborative works with community leaders, researchers, and cultural influencers to help each and every one of us build stronger relationships, embrace our differences, and rediscover our shared values and humanity —with the belief that by doing so, we can find common ground and solve our most urgent challenges together.

Through this Build It Back Better series, The Relational Era: A Culture of Connection, Bridging, and Belonging, we’ll lift up the voices of individuals and communities who are writing a new story of America. We’ll hear bold and practical ideas for what’s needed to build a more inclusive and connected culture from a wide range of vantage points and disciplines, and a through a mix of large public events, intimate working groups, and action-oriented articles. 

We’ll share powerful stories, compelling science and cross-disciplinary research that shows us new ways of living, working and thriving together – by embracing radical bridge-building in our politics, by inspiring interfaith cooperation in our communities, by using ritual in the service of social healing, by fostering intergenerational relationships and igniting a new generation of bridgers, by nurturing emotional intelligence and cultivating moral leadership, by promoting civic love and elevating bright spots of civic renewal. And so much more… 

We believe that addressing America’s crisis of connection and building a true culture of connection, bridging, and belonging is not only critically urgent, but possible — and already underway in communities across our country. 

We believe the prevailing narratives of distrust and division are not only flawed, but reversible. 

And we believe that when we sit down to listen, learn, and share different perspectives, we unlock entirely new ways of seeing ourselves, each other, and the needs and values we share.  

Through this series, we invite you to join us on a journey of envisioning what it will take to build a culture of connection, bridging, and belonging – and to commit to doing this vital work alongside us.

Jenn Hoos Rothberg is Executive Director of Einhorn Collaborative.