In my early twenties, I was in line at a grocery store to buy a 12-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon when a man in his 60s tapped me on my shoulder. I had my headphones on and connected to my Zune, and I hesitantly — and likely dismissively — asked what he wanted.
“Do you actually like that beer?” he asked me. I said yes, but mainly because it was all I could afford.
He then told me that PBR was the only beer he and his friends could get while they were serving in Vietnam. The beer being shipped over kept going bad, he said, and PBR was one of the few American domestics that the Viet Cong had stocked up on locally.
“And there was no way we were going to drink Budweiser,” I remember him saying.
I was so enamored with the story that my Safeway run-in turned into an hour of sitting in a Starbucks parking lot drinking cans of PBR in the Arizona sun. And I was shocked at how I had initially dismissed this man simply because he was so much older than me.
It’s estimated that by 2050, as the baby boomer generation continues to age into retirement, the number of Americans over the age of 65 will double to 83.7 million. The number of people over 85 will jump to 19 million in the same time period — over 400 percent larger than the same sector of the population in 2000.
Despite those figures, we are still surprisingly ageist. And the problem isn’t only with millennials throwing shade at boomers. Boomers have had it out for the young, as well. But what can we do to recognize when we’re being ageist? And, more important, where can we find similarities across all of the generations?
I realized I was ageist years ago. And even though I recognize my biases, it’s still a problem. I choose to live near Williamsburg, where younger people tend to live, and I actively seek out places where I know I won’t be the oldest person in the room — and at 30, that’s become an ever-increasing challenge in Brooklyn.
Most of my aversion — or, arguably, fear — of the elderly is backed up by science. In 1986, three social psychologists found that our awareness of the inevitability of death makes us afraid of our elders. The assumption, dubbed the Terror Management Theory, is that humans are motivated to quell the “terror” inherent in the human awareness of mortality by investing in worldviews that imbue life with meaning, and the individuals who subscribe to them with significance. One can argue that shows like “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” is an example of our perverse obsession with youth and beauty. And when we encounter people who are older than we are, we associate them with our fear of dying.
Another reason for our ageist attitudes may come down to how much time we spent with our parents as kids. According to different studies, our relationships with our parents help influence our attitudes toward the elderly.
That fear has trickled into the way we work with those older than us, such as passing on older workers to do more complicated assignments, or viewing age as a liability, where workers are “too old” or “overqualified.” Studies have also shown there is a perception that older work applicants are more pitied, or are given lower ratings scores in job applications when compared to youth of similar backgrounds.
It’s even affected funding for national science initiatives and grants.
One very visible manifestation of ageism is the way we communicate with each other. When speaking with an elderly person, if you notice you use the words like “honey” and “babe,” or if you speak slowly and omit words from your regular vocabulary, that’s a sign you’re being ageist. Social scientists call this lexicon “elderspeak,” and it’s similar to the way we talk to infants.
“Some aspects of elderspeak do compensate for natural changes in the cognitive skills of our elders. But most of the time, it is actually confusing and even harmful to talk this way,” reads a report from the University of Kansas’ Merrill Advanced Studies Center. “Most aspects of elderspeak actually decrease comprehension….These cultural tools do not have a basis in the science of communication.”
But just as we hold biases against those older than us, research shows that it’s a two-way street.
Ever wonder why millennials are killing, literally, everything? (Most recently, we’ve killed mayonnaise). It’s ageist media gold, and absolute clickbait that perpetuates the myth the youth are lazy and entitled.
“When we advocate for ending ageism against elders – while simultaneously writing off youth – we actually exacerbate ageism toward elders,” writes Laura Beck on the Eden Alternative Blog. “How can we expect youth to appreciate the contributions of older people, when we turn around and disrespect theirs? It only deepens the gulf between the two.”
So how do we solve for ageism between the generations? One way is to simply stand up for yourself.
“Know that you are worthy of honor and respect! Stand tall, feel your power, speak out,” writes Olivia Ames Hoblitzelle, author of “Aging with Wisdom.”
Advocates for seniors argue that speaking up for oneself might help others realize they’re using ageist language.
And don’t let your own limiting language set you back, writes Holly Parker, author of “Your Future Self.”
“Take a moment and consider what limitations you place on yourself because of age,” she writes in Psychology Today. “Have you ever thought that you were too old to do something that younger adults do and then stopped doing it purely because you accepted this belief?”
To combat ageism in future generations, studies have shown that some of the best ways to reduce bias is to encourage young children to respect their elders. In a study released last year, Belgian researchers found that pairing toddlers with their grandparents for quality play time resulted in more positive stereotypes of the elderly.
“The most important factor associated with ageist stereotypes was poor quality of contact with grandparents,” says Allison Flamion, a doctoral student who lead the team. “We asked children to describe how they felt about seeing their grandparents. Those who felt unhappy were designated as having poor quality of contact. When it came to ageist views, we found that quality of contact mattered much more than frequency.”
And, most importantly, recognize when you’re doing — or saying — something that might demean another person.
Take it from me: If you ever get a chance to crack open a few cans of PBR with someone from a different generation than yours, go for it. You might be surprised at what you have in common.
Tag: Baby Boomers
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What America Can Learn About Retirement From Australia
As the baby boomers begin entering their golden years, the United States is bracing for a retirement crisis that could change the system entirely. Longer life expectancy, rising costs of living, soaring health care expenses and an unstable public safety net could mean the next few generations are in for a bumpy ride when it comes to retirement.
In fact, about half of the country doesn’t have the savings to be able to maintain their current standard of living after retirement, Marketwatch reports. The Boston College Center for Retirement Research’s “National Retirement Risk Index,” which measures the portion of the population that can expect to be financially comfortable in retirement, found that number jumps to 60 percent among low-income workers, but hangs at 40 percent among higher-paid workers — painting a pretty bleak picture for Americans.
On the other side of the world, however, Australia has found a solution to ensuring a stable retirement for its citizens — and Americans should pay attention. Currently, more than 90 percent of employed Australians save for their golden years, representing an estimated $1.6 trillion in savings for the nation’s economy as of June 2013, the consulting firm Deloitte found.
But it wasn’t an overnight change of behavior for the Aussies. In fact, Australians shared the American sentiment about retirement until 1992, when the government created a mandatory savings program that required employers to contribute 9 percent of an employee’s salary to a retirement account for workers between 18 and 70.
“Only a few people received good retirement programs — people who worked for companies or the public sector,” said Jeremy Duffield, chairman of the Australian Centre for Financial Studies, an academic think tank. “Large groups of the population had no coverage at all.”
The “Superannuation Guarantee” program enables employees to pick which fund they want to invest their cash in, similar to a mutual fund or a public-sector group, the National Journal reports. The three-pronged system also relies on voluntary savings, which only around 20 percent of people take advantage of, and a means-tested government pension program similar to the U.S. Social Security system. Susan Thorp, the chair of finance and superannuation at the University of Technology in Sydney, estimates about 75 percent of Australian senior citizens take advantage of at least a partial means-tested pension.
In recent years, the Australian government has amended the program, with a schedule increase of the employer contribution, upping it to 12 percent by 2020, while eligibility for a means-tested pension will rise from age 65 to 67 over the next decade.
But Thorp estimates Australians between age 60 and 65 have around $170,000 in Aussie dollars saved in these compulsory accounts. Americans could stand to benefit from a model with a mandatory component like the Superannuation Guarantee, as only about half of U.S. workers receive retirement coverage through employers or institutions.
The Australian program also includes stringent rules about withdrawing money from the superannuation, which subsequently leads to a comfortable nest egg as residents head toward retirement. Meanwhile, the United States 401(k) model allows Americans to break into the account prematurely to pay off loans or in the wake of unemployment.
But much like our 401(k), the superannuation program comes with financial responsibility and individual choice. And that’s one area that Australia could stand to improve. Duffield points to a low financial literacy rate among Australians, who may not be paying attention to how their money is invested and the fees that apply.
But financial literacy aside, one of the biggest challenges in implementing the system is political will, which could pose a problem with gridlock and partisan attitudes gripping Congress. But it’s something that politicians need to look at seriously, as more Americans begin to retire. After all, as Australia has demonstrated over the last 22 years, committing to a plan can pave the way for a better future — one that’s more golden than the current outlook here in the United States.
MORE: 1 in 4 Can’t Retire Through Their Employer in Connecticut. Now the State Is Changing That.
These Seniors Needed Affordable Housing, and These Kids Needed Love. Together, They’re Beautifully Solving Both Problems
In Portland, Ore., there’s an idea so innovative that it has managed to bring together two sets of people with different problems — and solve them for both.
Welcome to the Bridge Meadows housing development, which helps elders and kids by providing a supportive environment for families that adopt foster kids alongside 27 units of affordable housing for seniors who agree to pitch in for 10 hours a week to help out with the kids. It’s a solution to a problem you don’t hear about often on the news: According to the PBS News Hour, 15 percent of seniors in America live below the poverty line, which often makes them struggle to find affordable housing. Meanwhile, families who adopt foster children face their own difficulties, as they are pressed for time, money and support.
Jackie Lynn, 60, is in the process of adopting her niece’s children because both of their drug-addicted parents are in jail. She works full time and felt she wasn’t able to give the kids the attention they needed until they moved to Bridge Meadows. Her family is partnered with neighbors Jim and Joy Corcoran, the “elders” who volunteer to spend time with the kids. “They are the reason that we thrive,” Lynn told Cat Wise of the PBS NewsHour. “Jim takes the boys every Sunday morning for about three hours. And they come home excited, with all these wonderful stories. You see children running up to them and giving them hugs. It’s just incredible to watch it.”
Meanwhile, the Corcorans experienced financial trouble after Jim lost his construction job, but now they live comfortably at Bridge Meadows with a $500 monthly rent payment. Joy Corcoran told Wise, “It was really difficult to find any decent housing that we could afford in any regard. And so when we had the opportunity to move here, it was just a godsend. It was like a huge relief.”
Bridge Meadows is funded by rents and donations from corporations and the community, and it provides a myriad of ways for kids and elders to interact every week. Elders lead story times, teach music lessons, tutor kids in school subjects, give them lifts to school and more. Derenda Schubert, the executive director of Bridge Meadows, said that there have been a few families who moved in and found the togetherness a bit too much, but for most of them it’s a perfect fit, and several seniors reported that their health improved through so much interaction. “Connections across the generations is critical, absolutely critical for aging well,” Jim Corcoran told Wise.
Plenty of people agree with Jim — which is why another intergenerational housing development like Bridge Meadows is currently under construction in Portland. But there’s good news for those who don’t live in Oregon, too: The staff of Bridge Meadows is consulting with people across the country who want to start their own such housing projects.
MORE: These Startups Offer Sleek Technological Innovations for the Elderly